There is much to love about road trips. Seeing towns, cities, and landscapes for the first time; that sense of being in control of your own fate; sampling local cuisines and cocktails.
But for people like me, who think they like adventure but are actually not super-adventurous, road trips can also be stressful. The complicated logistics of lodging and meals; the constant fear of the car breaking down (a fear that hums at a high frequency when one is driving through vast stretches of desert); the almost complete reliance on your communications technology, of which you are blissfully unaware until there’s some sort of glitch or failure (the iPhone dying, a patchy WiFi connection); the loneliness of itinerancy.
I was on the road for almost three months, from early August to late October. Not all of that time was spent researching my new book project on the Civil War in the desert Southwest. Some of it was vacation (bicycling in Aspen and hiking in Telluride with my husband), some of it was R&R (a lovely two-day break in Marfa, Texas), and some of it was devoted to academic conferences. The rest of the time, however, I was driving from one place to another, stopping for a few days every now and again to do research in archives or to visit national and state historic sites. It was an exhilarating and a crazy time.
All of this was made much more enjoyable by family and friends—and one case, the family of a friend—who housed and fed me and showed me around their towns, and by strangers who did me favors for no reason, or welcomed me into their communities.
The following people (in chronological order) showed me various kindnesses, and helped me get there and back again:
Joe Beilein, Jr. Erie, Pennsylvania
Sara Sukalich and Matt Mingione Columbus, Ohio
Amy Wood Bloomington, Illinois
Brian Craig Miller and Nick Messing Wichita, Kansas
John and Lynn Fritschel Centennial, Colorado
Elise and Ken Davis Santa Fe, New Mexico
Frances Jay and Rob Regehr Santa Fe, New Mexico
Nancy Castelli Santa Fe, New Mexico
Randy Egan Santa Fe, New Mexico
Sam Truett Albuquerque, New Mexico
Virginia Scharff and Christopher Wilson Albuquerque, New Mexico
The members of the Las Cruces cycling
group who welcomed me to their ride
through the pecan groves of Mesilla
and beyond Las Cruces, New Mexico
The young man at the Radio Shack
who calmed me down and sold me a
burner phone after my iPhone died in
the middle of White Sands Missile
Range* ** Las Cruces, New Mexico
Anne and Jerry Moore Tucson, Arizona
Rebecca Cohen Tucson, Arizona
Ben Irvin Tucson, Arizona
The NPS ranger at Fort Bowie National
Historic Site, who gave me a ride back to
my car so I would not have to hike back on
the trail with a backpack loaded down with
books about Apache history Bowie, Arizona
The security guard at the main gate at UTEP,
who took pity upon me and gave me a one-day
parking pass so I would not have to drive
around for another hour, looking in vain for a
parking space El Paso, Texas
Lonn and Dedie Taylor, who welcomed a
complete stranger into their home, told me
stories about the area, and then took me
to lunch Fort Davis, Texas
Catherine Clinton San Antonio, Texas
Greg Chico Austin, Texas
Natalie Ring and Jon Daniel Dallas, Texas
Jeanne Lopiparo Memphis, Tennessee
Rebecca Conard Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Gib Backlund Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Juliet Wagner Nashville, Tennessee
Nancy, Trey, Alex, and Kate Grayson
(and Oliver) Walton, Kentucky
Dave Kieran Saratoga Springs, New York
* Don’t worry, I managed to resuscitate it
** Don’t think I’m not suspicious about this
Here’s a story for you about encountering the kindness of strangers on a road trip. My wife-to-be and I made a cross country trip in the early 1970s—either 1971 or 1972. We put the back seat down in our Volvo station wagon and fit a four-inch-thick sheet of foam rubber in the bed. We had a large cooler and a five-gallon container for water. We took off from Providence, Rhode Island and spent a month meandering to Seattle and Vancouver Island and another month coming back, living in the car. Often we spent the night in state parks; sometimes just on the side of a road. I wish I had kept a journal so I could accurately reconstruct the trip. But I’ll never forget one memorable occasion. Our car broke down in Dodge City, Kansas. We learned it would it take a week for a new water pump to arrive from out of state and be installed. We figured we would continue to live in the car during the wait. But a local family insisted on taking us in. We lived with them for the week and had a most enjoyable time. It was the city’s centennial and a lot of the men in town had grown mustaches and beards for the occasion. The local movie house was playing “Dodge City” starring Errol Flynn over and over. In addition to the movie, we took in the sights—Boot Hill and the stockyards. Our host told us that as a teenage hobo during the Great Depression he had relied on the kindness of strangers to survive, so he was “paying it forward” (although that expression had yet to be coined). We didn’t realize it at the time, but our interlude in Dodge City was a highlight of the trip. We stayed in touch with the family for several years afterward. Incidentally, years later a carload of kids from Maine broke down in Providence and we took them in. We told them about our experience in Dodge City, and suggested they might have a similar opportunity someday.
Mark, that is a fantastic story! I love it!
Actually, Megan, I was the beneficiary of a fun and memorable day spent being able to put on my tour guide/commentator persona at the Glorieta Pass Battlefield, beautiful weather, stimulating company and conversation, and the real bonus was that of making a new friend! I hope – and look forward to – our paths crossing again in the future.
– Randy
That was such a great day! And you were an excellent tour guide — thanks again for everything!
This sounds like just the kind of nerdy adventure I’d love to take, because it involves research, visits with old friends, making new ones, seeing new landscapes, and tasting new cuisines. I’m a little envious and thrilled to hear about your new project all at the same time.
Karen, you should definitely embark on a research adventure! And once you start looking around, you’ll discover you have friends in the most amazing and random places — a nice byproduct of what is otherwise a totally insane academic hiring system …